10 years of Knuckles' story, or pushing a rock up a mountain forever

[03-05-2026}

I've been playing Sonic Adventure DX' Knuckles' story at slightly below WR level for 10 years at this point and I think it's finally time for me to admit to myself that I don't have what it takes to actually get to the top. Sure, I can now beat the WR from 10 years ago almost routinely, so my skill shifted together with the WR and I have a lot of progress I can look back upon, but I've always been just below the cutting edge.

I think in a category like Knuckles' story it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking that I just need that one run with good RNG that'll put me up there, but after over 23,000 attempts, I've had plenty of runs with good RNG, but I can't seem to make use of them. And I don't mean this in the way that I choke them away. I didn't even really have any big, tragic WR chokes or anything. I don't even get to that point where I would have a WR pace to choke away. My best runs that didn't finish were, best-case, about tied going into Sky Deck. So that's nothing.

I'm not sure what I'm missing exactly. The fact that no matter the era, I was just below WR level suggest it's a nerve thing, some mental blockade that's preventing me from reaching out and grabbing it. But I think, at least in recent years, it's as simple as that on the very fundamental level of basic motor-functions, my inputs lack a tightness and consistency that other top SADX runners have. Just a lot of tiny things adding up. My trouble-taps aren't quick enough, my thumb isn't steady enough. I hit those tricks at just a slightly lower consistency. My inputs don't come with the deliberation to really know what I'm doing.

I like to think that a run isn't a run until after you made it past Red Mountain, so resetting before Red Mountain doesn't feel like I lose anything worthwhile. But I gotta get the runs to Red Mountain first before I can make it past Red Mountain. So all those silly early game mistakes I lose time on or reset over screw me in the long run, even if it doesn't feel like I'm choking away The Run, but I am. Not one particular run, but my chance at getting A Run.

Honestly, actually getting a WR hasn't really been a goal of mine in many years, but the thing that's driving me insane is how unsatisfactory my current PB is. It felt like a bad, sloppy run that only by a fluke ended up just barely PBing. When I got it, I almost didn't even upload it cause it felt like I'd beat it soon anyways. But it's been, I don't even wanna look how many thousand attempts now. Really all I want at this point is to beat this run, but after such a long time playing against this stupid run that I'm surely gonna beat soon feels again like playing for WR.